Letting Go of Perfectionism
Hey perfectionist, let’s chat, it is time to loosen the reigns on perfectionism.
Your strength is that you aim high and give it your all. Great quality, however, there are some negative emotions and thought patterns surrounding that.
No worries though, thoughts can be changed and patterns can be broke down and rerouted to allow relief from the perfectionism cycle.
So, what are the faulty thought patterns surrounding perfectionism?
It is great that you aim high in all you do, but you can’t beat yourself up over the mistakes that were made.
You challenge yourself to do better, then get caught up in focusing on your failures.
You try to avoid mistakes, but in the process miss out on the lesson.
Trying to nail down the perfect word, picture or action...but in the end turns into more procrastination and inaction
Tend to see only the extremes, black and white, no grey area
You believe working full force is the key to success, however, end up burnt out and overwhelmed
All or nothing mentality that in turns leads to an impossible first step causing a rise in emotions that in turn hold you back
The faulty patterns above ae a sign some inner work needs to be done. The story goes way beyond being perfect in any aspect. Perfection is a sign of insecurity. A BIG, hello, here’s your sign. Insecurities lead to “wanting” things to be perfect. We feel “perfect” decreases the risk of failure, rejection, judgement, hurt and overall fear. This feeling continues to nudge us and our faulty patterns of thinking. The cycle goes on.
Time to drop the mindset of fear and start working in the right direction towards letting go perfectionism. Become mindful of your patterns and recognize them when they arise.
Letting go of Perfectionism
Honestly, what is perfect anyway...what I believe is perfect and what you believe is perfect are probably completely different. Could even be completely opposite. You AND only you, are the judge of perfect, it is only a perception. Perfectionism is in the eye of the beholder. Perfect isn’t something tangible, it’s only a filter your mind has created. A filter that is used as a cover up for many internal conflicts and mindset blocks.
You certainly were’t born with it, it is a learned pattern of thoughts that were created surrounding the many things you walked through in life. Just as you learned them, you can unlearn them as well. Thoughts can be changed and flipped for a greater cause.
Find Beauty in Imperfection
Switch it up, change your view of imperfection. What thoughts immediately come to mind when you think of imperfection? Begin to gain awareness of those surrounding thoughts. Acknowledge them, question them and sit with them awhile. Allow yourself to see the pattern of your thoughts.
Thoughts can be changed easily once you become fully aware of them. You can’t change what you don’t take the time to learn. Being rejected is a thought, failing is a thought, and technically speaking “imperfection” is just a thought as well. Circumstances are real, thoughts are not, and therefore you have the power to change them.
Once you gain awareness of your thoughts, you are then able to actively work towards changing them.
Find beauty in the imperfections, find the positive. How can you learn or grow from it?
For instance, you do a Facebook live and fumble your words and can’t get past it afterwards. In the positive mind, you showed up, you shared and were authentic, which gives people a chance to connect better with you.
So when imperfections cross your path, gain awareness of your thoughts and find the positive, find the beauty and hold onto that.
Take Action, Take Imperfect Action
If you don’t decide to take action, perfection will continue to keep you from sharing your story and strengths with the world.
Imperfect progress is better than standing still. Perfection will not allow you to move forward any faster...in fact it may feel as if you are spinning your wheels in the same spot. Maybe you have a solid business plan, you have put time and effort into envisioning and building it. It is more than likely well thought out and written. Except you find yourself endlessly feeling the need to “perfect” it, adding on to it, tweaking it often.
But...how do you know what you actually need to tweak if you never put it out into the world and receive feedback. You may feel like progress is being made, but really only “busy-ness” is being made. You are allowing perfection to distract you and throw you of the course of true success.
Now, I’m not saying to throw some ideas together and shove it into the world. However, I do challenge you to take action and share at least one thing you are working on. Stop spinning your wheels in the same spot and move forward. You are more than ready for the next step, whatever that may entail.
Time to stop,think,and reflect...
Think deep here...what has perfectionism allowed you achieve and what has it held you back from?
Procrastination
Oh hey, procrastination, I think we all may know you a little too well.
Procrastination can be a sneaky sign of perfectionism. It has nothing to do with laziness and everything to do with setting unrealistic expectations which in turn lead to anxiety and overwhelm. The feelings of overwhelm and anxiety then cause you to shut down and put off the work because it’s obvious you aren’t feeling it. Then the perfection/procrastination cycle keeps on spinning.
So let’s break the darn circle, break the pattern and get out of that spot keeping you “stuck”.
Mindset check:
In your own words what is the difference between done and perfect?
What do you feel are the consequences of choosing done over perfect?
Now sit with your answers...are the answers you just came up with real circumstances, meaning the real deal, book of life states this would happen.Or...are they your own thoughts, imaginative outcomes?
What thoughts could you choose instead?
Fill in you thought exchange below:
I release (old thought) and replace it with (new, higher thought)
Focus on your why
Focusing on your why places you missions/passion/goal whatever it may be above all else. Creating a strong and sometimes scary why will trump all other thoughts. Lead with a mission, lead with a purpose, knowing that sharing your message is more important than how to share it perfectly.
Honestly, some of life’s greatest messages I received were imperfectly stumbled upon, not wrapped up with a beautiful bow presented on a silver platter.
Allow your Authenticity to Shine
Just for the record, perfect is not attainable, but being authentic sure is. Allow yourself to be authentic. Laugh at the messes, the mistakes, the fumbles, then learn and move forward. The world appreciates authenticity way more than perfectionism. It allows us all to be on the same level and feel comfortable.
Think of your fav entrepreneur or total boss babe? Are you inspired by them because you feel they are absolutely perfect or because they are authentic? My wild guess is you love how authentic they are in their message, life and biz. Am I right?
Allowing your true authenticity to shine through will begin to erase the overwhelm and anxiety surrounding perfectionism.
So…pause. breath. let it go!
How can you begin to loosen the reigns on perfectionism this week?
